Hermes vs Apollo


Over the years, we’ve done a bunch of themes for Summer League.  Cause I love themes and you can’t stop me.  The first year I ran S.L. in 2006 was the year Snakes on a Plane came out in theaters, so that had to happen, cause duh!  Mother Fucking Hammers in this Mother Fucking End Zone! But then if you remember it was the decades for a long time.  We got to have a lot of fun team names during that time.  Draft Dodger Blue from the 60’s.  Pol Pot Brownies from the 70’s I believe.  Those were two of my favorites.  Up until this year, the team name that most people said they wanted to play for was Pinky and the Brain for the 90’s.

But then with the Gods and Goddesses thing, Klepto and Kumbha practically did back flips to get the name Hermes.  They were trying to trade up for that name with everyone.  I can only imagine the amount of favors they gave out to get to the head of the line.  How many of you are owed a beer or three?  It was better than when Mike Ditka gave up his entire draft for Ricky Williams.  Ditka couldn’t have loved Ricky as much as the USC girls wanted Hermes.  Now, I don’t even know what their infatuation is with that name, and I wrote this before reading their first recap, so maybe they mention it.  I don’t know.  But anyone who wants a name THAT BADLY, I mean you just gotta give it to ’em.

I understand the USC Hellions of Troy relation to the Greek Gods, just not sure why Hermes specifically.  I mean, in a way, I get it.  Hermes is a cool cat.  He’s super fast, which is normally not a trait a guy boasts about.  And he wears really cool winged shoes.  And look at the dude.  He’s ripped.


The artist may have added a few extra muscle groups that may not be anatomically possible, but you get the point.

Anyhoo, thought you might find that interesting.  If they don’t mention their affinity for the sculpted God in their recap, I’m gonna have to hit them up for the story at the bar soon.

Here’s Klepto and Kumbha with their recap:

RecapKleptoOn the drive over:
Me: How do you think tonight is going to go?

Julia: I don’t know, but we have beer.

So if you’re a total frisbee dork (which is highly likely if you’re reading this recap), you watched Alex Carey’s hilarious 3 hour live stream of the draft and saw the mad hate that our baggage got (honestly, a lot of it was fair).

Julia and I were just a couple of fun girls trying to have a fun time, but now we’re riled up and Hurricane Klumbha is ready to wreck Summer League.

For real though, Summer League is my favorite and I’m just really excited to be captaining again.

Faced off with Apollo last night and although the game ended with us winning 15-12, we didn’t pull away until the end. Was a great game—intense, competitive, but for the most part, everyone was spirited and kind. Apollo’s Natty Brockway even joined us for a post-game shotgun.


Sober kicked major @$$, great chill handling and so many D’s. Also such a warm sideline presence. Number #1 in the draft and in our hearts!!!!!

Met former USC Hellions coach Frankie for the first time and fell in love after he came up with the cheer: “We’ve got a bad case of the Hermes!”

Jack Briskie is early season MVP—HE BROUGHT SPEAKERS FOR US

Apollo’s Amy Halvorsen tricked me before the game—being all nice and chill in her work clothes, eating sushi, saying she was feeling sluggish. I should’ve known that even with a full belly, girl is a straight up animal on the field, was definitely not fun to defend.

Dylan Greenleaf made some amazing deep cuts and has an equally amazing last name.

Julia had awesome hucks, a few ill advised hammers—the usual. Was also very quotable the entire evening. One of my favorites was how she kept telling people that she was going to write about them in the recap. “THIS IS GOING IN THE REPORT”

Saber referred to me as “Diesel’s girlfriend,” which was cute and gave me a nice chuckle.

Robin Hood will always have my heart, but Joxer’s Daly is a cool spot too!

Great bar turnout from all four teams that were at Jackie Robinson. However, I seem to be slowing down in my old age, was the only one of six that was unable to finish their entire tequila shot in one gulp. Don’t worry, I’ll step up my game as the season progresses. Huge shoutout to my BB Wall-E for being our DD.

Woke up today with a mild hangover—Summer League has truly began. Much love to my new team, see you all next Tuesday when we take on Orange Hestia!

One vote for Robin Hood over Joxer’s.  Robin Hood however does not have karaoke nights on Wednesdays.  That alone pushes Joxer’s up a little bit for me.

Frankie Rho, it should be mentioned, is a legend in the USC Hellions timeline.  He took over coaching the Hellions when Broccoli and Punky were just freshmen (Punky wasn’t even Punky at the time.  She was Freckles.) And looked at a program that was still pretty new and was struggling to make Regionals, and boldly said “when this freshman class is seniors, they will definitely be going to Nationals.  It was an eyebrow raising statement, but they absolutely accomplished that goal, and now USC is a annual force.  I was honored to do stats for them during those late aught years.

RecapKumbhaThere are moments in summer league where I absolutely love it, and there are moments where I start to move the needle towards disdain. Last night we had a super fun, loud, spirited, good at frisbee team, which was a tally mark under the love column. I am so happy with who we drafted despite our preset limitations, and it all worked out for the best.

interrupting this report – i just received the worst news, speaking of the frustrations. when people on their attendance put like 90% or even 80%, and then you draft them – and then you find out they’re gone for the first 5-6 games!!!! like homies. 80% means you miss 2 games. dos. that’s it. alright i’m over it – except our round 2/3/4/6 guys are all missing 3-6 games EACH. i’m a tad salty. but i love all of them so its fine.

okay, back to the actual game – i’m not andy here and no one cares about my general thoughts. so me and my carpools klepto, and wall-e somehow arrived at the fields at 7. no one knows how. so we hung out, our team slowly arrived. luckily klepto and i had done thorough research on every one of our teammates – because the other green team was on the field next to us, so when someone wandered up to our circle in green, we knew exactly whether or not they belonged. the game started pretty on time – we were missing a ton of people i’ll be honest. we ended the night with 5 ladies and 7 dudes — hopefully next week we’ll get some more attendance (shout out to all you hermes out there come back to us). but we faired well enough as a small crew- final score was 15-12 (thanks brian kuhn on the stats and scorekeeping and also setting up and bringing the cones!! you’re the man!)- they went up a few breaks in the beginning, we got it back, then we traded, the game felt like we were down the whole time, though it was a bit closer than that – we were mostly trading until we pulled ahead at the end. White used the power of forgetfulness at some point i want to say before halftime – but our team was prepared…kind of…. so our team has an email chain going of how to use the call power to our advantage, we debated things like catching the pull and running it into the end zone and overturning the travel call, we talked about having 10 people on the field and overturning that call…but what ended up happening was much different.

the whole game there was tons of guy on girl action. two bearded unknown tan men on white who i think were roommates, kept D-ing the crap out of our ladies in the deep space. like chill. you can run 50 yards in 5 seconds but calm the f down. white plays a very poachy game with these dudes, and another bearded blonde man named dylan, who to be honest i wasn’t a fan of on the field, but we became friends at the bar, who were just all up in my grill it felt like. it’s fine, we had a team talk and now our men know how to punish poachers – but anyway back to us using our power. so someone had hucked it, and it was me and kwok in the endzone, and i was chillin and jumped up for the disc (not even remotely close to it lol my bad) – then kwok hits me as i am claiming my vertical space and calls a shitty foul call, like homie you were not going to catch that disc a, b i was already here, and c you’re just pissed you’re losing. but anyway, i kept my cool and i was forced to use our power to contest his call, mainly because i didn’t want to send the disc back – and then we scored the point. so, while it did not get used in a creative way, it was used for justice and all was well.

shout out to all my amazing forest teammates. some highlights were: sober lived up to his first round pick status getting countless huge Ds for us (and when he walked up i totally judged him for his brown shorts), vivian and max were probably the two fastest hermes on the field cutting all over the place – darren is a workhorse – james was just as cute in person as in the facebook photos we stalked– justin, or as he asked us to call him halfway through the game – jfang was our anchoring handler, and our entire team just balled out. i can’t wait to see whats next for us next week!

also whoever has made joxers the post game bar, never again. $9 for a single tequila shot?? that’s the worst thing i’ve ever heard. next week you can find forest at a bar more on the east side that’s cheaper. yes i’m unemployed and a college kid. mandrake has $5 beer and a shot – so fair warning, we will be turning up there.

Wow, I don’t think you’re going to get a more honest recap ever.  Let’s call this HONEST TRAILERS: SUMMER LEAGUE.

Joxer’s not getting love today.  Spike suggested I ask them to get us a free pitcher per team each time we go there.  I’ll try.  I went once before the season started, but the owner wasn’t there.  Even if we can get one free pitcher a night, it’s worth asking for.

So Kumbha’s hatin’ on some people, making friends at the bar, telegraphing her mid-season hook ups, and looking up bars on Google maps.  How’s she gonna top this in Week 2?

She did reference Brian Kuhn’s score keeping, and here it is.

RecapBrianKAndrew to Kwok 1-0 Apollo-White

Amy to Aegis 2-0

Khumba to Wall-E 2-1

Khumba to Justin 2-2

Wall-E to Klepto 3-2 Hermes-Forest

Kwok to Dylan 3-3 — After scoring, Apollo uses power making Hermes pull, and…

Kwok to X 4-3 Apollo — Apollo’s power works.

Wall-E to Viv 4-4

Khumba to Max 5-4 Hermes

Joel to Sam 5-5

Dylan to Ruth 6-5 Apollo

James to Wall-E 6-6

Austin to Justin 7-6 Hermes

Kwok to Jacob 7-7

Khumba to Klepto 8-7 Hermes


Kwok to Drew 8-8

Justin to Sobel 9-8 Hermes

Max to Judge 10-8

Kwok to Amy 10-9

Aegis to Ruth 10-10

Dylan to Sam 11-10 Apollo

Amy to Andrew 12-10

Max to Khumba 12-11

Khumba to Sobel 12-12

Sobel to Khumba 13-12 Hermes — Hermes used it’s power to overturn a call by Apollo, and, it works… Hermes gets the score.

Justin to Frankie 14-12

Darren to Sobel 15-12 — Hermes triumphs scoring the final 5 point of the evening.

5 for 5 now on the power to force the other team to pull to you getting picked first.  And a nice comeback.

Here’s a pic of Team Hermes that they sent:


And we still have another recap.  This one from Apollo’s side.  Here’s Liverpool:

RecapDanielHAs is traditional during Summer League, we began our first night with a good ole spirit circle. Apollo being the god of arts, music, poetry and manly beauty (lol), we presented Hermes with a specially-but-not-so-carefully crafted Haiku.

Oh dear Hermes, sup,

Please do not travel on us,

May this game be good

See because Hermes is the god of communication and travel. I was wondering if the comma is allowed in the first sentence, but we’re the god of poetry so we are saying yes. Anyway, hopefully that made up for the fact that my team wasn’t all that enthusiastic about the idea of a twerk-off for the pull. Instead we did a traditional flip for the pull and Apollo won, but decided NOT to receive on the pull. This was a bit of a contentious call amongst ourselves (sorry), but meh we went with it.

So Apollo won the first point but did NOT use the pull power. Again, going against the norm here, not really for any reason at all, just to be different I guess. We immediately went up 2-0, but then Hermes tied it up 2-2. At this point we said OK, better score this one and use the power to get some momentum (I was actually a little surprised Hermes had not done that already, but who was I to argue), and yes we scored both the points, but Hermes still stayed tight on us. 4-4. 5-5. 6-6. 7-7. I think we were the faster team, but Hermes had some great handling and patience. A huge shout out to their ladies who really came through a lot of times on some wobbly discs and with some great endzone plays for the score. That said, we did manage to take half at 8-7.

There was a period of time here Apollo started throwing stuff away, getting impatient. Picking up the disc immediately and not valuing it. So we had a little friendly chat about that. Hermes it seems was all amped up about their great handling and defense. Although Apollo took half, and although we calmed down a bit with the disc, we just could not run with it.

Despite taking half, the score just kept getting tied up. 8-8. 10-10. 12-12. There was one point in here where Hermes tried to use their second power, but it got a little heated. Hermes attempted to use the power to reverse a “down” call. It was not a foul though, it was just called down on the ground in a very close attempt at catching it. Hermes wanted to use the power to reverse that call. We debated for a few minutes whether that was legal. In the end Hermes recalled the Power and decided to use it at a later time instead. Now it is past 10pm at this point and both teams are in it to win it, for fear of the lights going out soon. Apollo got at least two pretty great D’s… except the Hermes women were there to catch the wobbly disc EVERY TIME. It was like they had wings on their shoes. It was in this manner (on top of being a really good team of course) that Hermes just went and scored the last three points in a row to win the game, 15-12.

Although it was frustrating for us, for me, that was without a doubt a GREAT first game! I wish we could have a rematch in the regular season, but alas. Thanks for the amazing first game Hermes!

That is interesting that both teams waited to use the power to receive the pull, when on Tuesday, it got used pretty quickly.  We’ll see if next week teams wait even longer to use it.  Guess it’ll depend on what the other power is.  I’ll release the answer tomorrow.


Date Time League Season
June 9, 2017 12:00 am Summer League 2017


Rancho Cienega Recreation Center

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