The first thing you’re gonna notice here, before you get into Joanna’s recap, is that the game ended on a tie. You can see it at the top. So I know what you’re saying to yourself. “Damn Andy, that feels like there’s been a lot of ties this year? I’ve been reading all the recaps and this is like the third tie.” Well, I’m glad you mentioned it (and I’m glad you’ve been reading all the recaps), because you sure are right, you super sleuth. This IS the third tie of the year. And I feel I know what you’re gonna ask me next. “Damn Andy, is that, perchance, a record?” Well, it’s funny that you ask that, because I happen to know the answer. Why yes. It IS a record. But it only ties a record. From 2005 and 2008 when there were also three ties those years. So, just to be absolutely clear on this:
- The record for most ties in a season is tied at 3.
- The record for most ties by one team in a season is tied at 2.
- The record for most ties by one team for their career is tied at 5.
This is the only appropriate gif for those stats:
Okay, so now you know the what. Let’s find out the how. We go to renowned recapper, Joanna “Let’s go to the mall.” Whitney.
DISCLAIMER: If you don’t know the show How I Met Your Mother all of this will make even less sense than it already does.
Ted – Animal Style (in general)
Lilly – Snatch
Marshall – Julius
Barney – Semi Creatively Named Team (in general)
Robin – Joanna
Wendy the Waitress – Goh
Carl – Cedar
Lady 1 – Reed
Lady 2 – Ted
Lady 3- B Sauce
“Wayne Gretzky” – Helix
The Blitz – Jorge Garcia
Recap of last night’s episode:
Barney drags Ted to MacLarens for another night of marathon lady chasing. Barney is ready to break his record of 12 ladies in one night, and he thinks getting Ted to act as competition (haha, competition, Ted? yeah right) might help push him over that line. Barney starts racking up the phone numbers while Ted is left bumbling over his words trying to explain his latest Architecture lesson plan to some bored 21 year olds.
When they leave, Ted sits down to mope in the booth from his rejection when Robin enters and joins him at the table. Ted is hitting it off and even gets a sly flirtatious hand touch out of Robin. 1 point for Ted to Barney’s 4 ladies. Marshall and Lilly join because they have a babysitter for the whole night. They hear of the competition and want to join Ted’s team. Barney happily obliges because Ted could use all the help. He’s not worried.
Wendy the Waitress stops by to take their drink order and Lilly gets her to give her her number for “ladies” night. Point for Ted’s team. Barney scoffs. “That was cute, Lilly, but watch how a man gets this done.” Barney uses page 69 of The Playbook and adeptly gets phone number 5 of the night. Lilly isn’t going down without a fight and walks up to Carl behind the bar and in half the time gets his number so she can invite him to her next art show. 5-3. Barney isn’t scared and shows off the latest phone number he collected while Lilly was off fake flirting with Carl. 6-3.
It’s already 2am and the bar is closing, but now with Lilly in Ted’s corder, she’s not giving up. “To Puzzles!!!” she yells and the bar erupts in cheers. The team races upstairs along with their crowd. Ted follows googly eyed after Robin.
Marshall and Lilly are on the case. A slap bet is put in place. 4 slaps for the winner. Marshall and Lilly race around the party getting Ted more numbers while he stares longingly at Robin across the room. With the cheap drinks flowing, everyone is in good spirits, which helps Lilly and Marshal to pull ahead. Two ladies giggle over an old photo of Marshall and Ted. It’s cute enough that Lady 1 gives her number to Lady 2 for Marshall to keep. Meanwhile Lilly gets Lady 3 in the corner to give her her number for a mom group meet up. Lilly gets one more number from a Puzzles patron when she sees Wendy the Waitress giving her eyes across the room. Will this be Lilly’s chance to make out with a woman? No that’s stupid. You’re stupid, let’s be stupid… So stupid it works, and Lilly scores her first lady kiss before Marshall pulls her away for a breather on the roof. They have time since the score sits at 8-6 in their favor, and there is no last call.
Barney is getting worried. Marshall and Lilly are far stronger opponents than he gave them credit for. Puzzles is not his best locale for scoring, but he’s never let Ted stop him before. He spills his drink on the nearest lady and tells her he has the best home service dry cleaner. If she gives him her number he can set the whole thing up. It works! He’s back in the game. 8-7. Robin in the meantime has had a few too many Molson’s and is starting to talk hockey. She catches the eye of the burliest woman in the room and scores her number before realizing that this woman is not Wayne Gretzky. She hands the number to Ted. 9-7.
Ted hears that the real party is on the roof and slides out the window just as Lilly and Marshall come back into the apartment. At that very moment The Blitz walks in the door knocking over a ceramic Dalmatian that sets off a Rube Goldberg effect that flips a hat off of Barney’s head up into the air where he then catches it in his teeth. The new version of “The Gentleman” is born as the curse of The Blitz flows over to Ted who just missed the moment turning back around in the window. Barney gets a flock of ladies heading over to him. Marshall intercepts two and diverts them to Ted and Lilly. Each get a number but Ted worries he’s ignoring Robin and quickly forgets the woman. He blurts out across the room “Robin, I’m still in love with you!” Oooo, bad move there Ted. Robin squirms and slips out the door. “The Mosby” never works out well. Lilly and Marshall run to comfort him. Meanwhile Barney is pulling in numbers left and right. He brings the count up to 12-12. It’s anyone’s game to lose now.
Lilly and Marshall rally Ted to get his spirits up. Wendy the Waitress approaches him, she may be making eyes at Lilly again, but Ted doesn’t notice. He starts to ask her about her favorite style of wall sconce when…… the power goes out.
Puzzles may never close, but Rancho Cienega certainly does. Final score: 12-12. Tune in next week for more of Ted and Barney follies.
I feel like the handful of HIMYM episodes I’ve watched prepared me for this. But clearly, I need to watch more.
It’s not surprising Joanna wrote this about HIMYM. If you’ve noticed, she bares a slight resemblance to the “Mother” in the show, Cristin Milioti.
|February 28, 2018||12:00 am||Winter League||2018|
|Rancho Cienega Recreation Center|