RecapSummer 2019House Tyrell vs. House Baratheon FAKE

TUES, JULY 23
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House Tyrell
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House Baratheon
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GAME RECAP

This is the one with the fake Papa recap.

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Last night I happened to be at the field playing on the other side, and I didn’t see any of what Paparatheon is about to mention, but I heard about all of it at the bar afterwards, and it’s….. shocking!

I’m just gonna let Papa tell the story, cause I couldn’t believe it myself when I heard it last night:

Another long, close, hard fought game for House Baratheon. But unfortunately, we just couldn’t pull out the W this time around. Despite 7/9 of our ladies showing up for the fight this week, we were super low on men. And aside from numbers, this week’s game was really just a mess. Perhaps if Greg (Cubby) had showed up, the result would have been different.

By 8:15 we still had just 2 guys ready to play, and though we kindly asked the Tyrells if we could wait a few more minutes to round out our numbers, Christi was adamant that we start promptly on frisbee time (aka 8:20 pm). We even asked if we could borrow a guy or two until the rest of ours showed up, but Seth just said “too bad, losers”, and told us that if Greg had been the one asking, their response might have been different.

We ended up pressuring one of the random track runners to join us for a few points. He wasn’t super stoked about it, but Nugget had threatened to beat the shit out of him if he didn’t. Needless to say, our first few points were really rough. Tyrell came out strong and scored 3 in a row. Merlin beat Cory to the endzone on a breakside huck, after which he proceeded to spike the disc, pick it up, and wipe it on Cory. The track runner was really concerned. Perhaps if Greg was there, he could have explained a little more about Frisbee to the poor guy.

We managed to come back with a few scores of our own, but not before playing a point where half of our team forgot which direction we were going, and worked the disc towards our own end zone. The track runner reminded us that we were going the wrong way, after which we refocused, turned around, and proceeded to score the goal. Real rough. If Greg had been on our sideline, he definitely would have reminded us sooner.

Tyrell took half 8-6, and the Baratheons were in a really sour mood. Char was so angry she started a fight with Joanna Tyrell over a pick call. Cory was mad dogging Box just for being tall. Claire told Ringo that the Beatles were old news and her nickname was dumb. Christi asked if we wanted to do a spirit circle to clear the air, but I was too angry and told her that if she couldn’t wait to start the game on time, we didn’t have time for a spirit circle. Not one of my finer moments. If Greg had been there, he almost certainly could have tempered our team spirit and attitude.

The rest of the game was more or less the same. We scored some points, Tyrells scored some points, and we caught up a little bit when more of our men showed up (Greg didn’t, though). Jordan got a run-through D and then immediately ran to the EZ for a score for glorious bookends. Devin put his body on the line with a huge layout grab for a score. Cory might have thrown a nice throw to Greta. But it just wasn’t enough. There weren’t enough hammers, and no game-winning thumbers. It definitely would have gone differently if Greg was there.

So thanks, Greg, for single-handedly ruining our shot this week. Screw Cam for also not showing up. Christi and Seth are on my shit list for poor spirit. Everyone else tried really hard and earned a wonderful trip to the bar. Hopefully the guys will get it together next week and we can win another game in OT. PapaWRATHeon out.

Damn, so much to discuss.  Surprising behavior by Christi and Seth.  I saw them at the bar after, and they both looked pissed.  I couldn’t even talk to them.  I tried texting Seth and he didn’t respond.  So weird.

Getting the track player to play is awesome!  That’s amazing improvisation.  Let’s sign that guy up for league.  And I love that he told you which direction to go.  That is hysterical!!!

I can’t believe Greg ruined everything.  No wait, I can.  He’s the worst.  Talk about letting your team down.  Damn Cubby!  Time to apologize.

The Beatles aren’t old news.  They were just featured in the movie Yesterday as the greatest song writers in the history of all time.  Great songs, but mediocre film.

And now, let’s hear from the other side.  Here’s Christi Tyrell:

In Game of Thrones, Lady Margaery Tyrell married not one, not two, but THREE different Baratheons. That girl was going to get on (or at least next to) the Iron Throne one way or the other. Granted, her first Baratheon husband, Renly, was killed by a ghost – weak. The second one, Joffrey, was killed by Lady Margaery’s own grandmother – hell yes. And then the third one, Tommen, killed himself after his mother killed Margaery (and a couple hundred other people) soo…. zero sum game? Do we even need to play out this ultimate matchup? All signs point to it being a tie anyway. I bet I could have talked Greg Baratheon into a truce, but since he wasn’t there, we’ll never know.

Instead, Tyrell started on defense, and everything was so evenly matched that we traded points all the way to at least 5s or 6s. Yes. We were tied. Often.

But then Tyrell pulled ahead to take half 8-6! Suck it, Joffrey.

Despite Greg being MIA (or perhaps because of it), the Baratheons came out of half with a vengeance. They took the first two points, and when I later checked Papa’s meticulously kept notes on her whiteboard, I realized they had scored 5 points to our measly 1 point since half. Apparently all of our marriages meant nothing and those damn Baratheons were coming for our throats.

All throughout this, there was a lot of action going on. Tipped discs for a D that got bobbled and almost recovered but ultimately fell to the ground. Amazing grabs that on any other night would have been turns. One Tyrell was taken down by a turf monster. One Tyrell was taken down by another Tyrell. And then a third Tyrell was taken out by a Baratheon.

I subbed in on that last point after the injury, which had already had at least one or two turns. And then there were at least one or two more turns before Tyrell called a time out. And THEN there were at least one or two MORE turns before Baratheons called a time out. They subbed out two players, so Tyrell got more fresh legs, and I subbed out again. Yes, that’s right. I played on a point that I neither started nor finished because it lasted THAT LONG. And I’m old and get tired a lot. And those Baratheon girls run ALL THE TIME.

I have no idea who scored on that point either, but Tyrell did bring it back to tie it up (again) at 12s and then again at 13s. I’m sure if Greg had been there, the Baratheons would have finished it right there, but alas. No Greg. So instead Tyrell threw an endzone-to-endzone cross-gender goal to score two points for the win!

What’s that? We don’t do that in Summer League? Tyrell didn’t score anything past 13 points? I’d say you can ask Greg what the final score was, but he wasn’t there so he doesn’t know.

Let’s just call it a tie. Please.

P.S. We had the most successful spirit circle ever where we alternated Baratheon/Tyrell evenly all the way around the field. Fortunately, we had our team photographer on hand (Colin) and he got this lovely 360 of us.

You can click on that smaller image to see the full enlarged one.

Hmmmm.  Funny Christi didn’t mention any of the stuff Papa talked about.  Guess she saw things differently.

Meanwhile, I’m trying to figure what that thing is behind the baby in the glaring gif.  Is that a dog’s tail wagging?  Cause otherwise, I don’t know what the hell that thing is, and it’s really distracting me.

I love that Christi used the time-out sub rule to it’s full capacity.  I usually have to remind people that in Summer League, you can sub up to two players through a time-out.  (I fully believe that should be a rule in all of Ultimate.)  And so Christi subbing herself in and then out again on two separate time-outs on the same point may be a record, cause I’ve certainly never heard of it before, and will go onto the Summer League Records Page.

Also, total aside, for that last paragraph I wrote “I love Christi used the time-out sub rule……” but then I went back and changed the wording slightly because I remembered this time that someone from my work said I told her I loved her.  And actually what I wrote was, “I love you found that photo of Ted Williams”.  For some reason she stopped after the third word of that sentence, and I realized that if I had just added the word “that” after “love” it could have saved a lot of awkwardness.  So it’s not that I don’t love Christi, but you understand.

One comment

  • g. Preston

    July 25, 2019 at 1:37 pm

    Wait, what?

    Reply

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