RecapSummer 2019House Tarth vs. House Stark

MON, JULY 29
12
0123456789001234567890
House Tarth
0123456789001234567890
House Stark
12

GAME RECAP

We’re down to the final two weeks of the season.  The battle is still on for the bragging rights of greatest House of the regular season, and Tarth kept themselves in the conversation with the win, holding just a half game behind Tully.

I will have all tournament bracket information up this week.  Hopefully by end of day today.  If not, tomorrow.

Let’s get to the Tarth v Stark recap, by Scott Stark:

Coming off of our upset of then-2nd place Greyjoy, House Stark was looking to recreate the magic against now-2nd place Tarth. Our direwolf was ready.

Things looked good at both the start and at the end. Unfortunately, there was a middle.

House Stark was savage to begin the game but answered House Tarth goal-for-goal to 3-3. Our women were using a fancy triangle defense to try to save a little gas but once Tarth figured it out, they rattled off 5-straight points to take half at 8-3.

Apparently. I don’t really know. I’m in Illinois.

C-Note sent me a photo of the scoreboard and a little summary of what had been going on at half and given all my many years of experience, I was able to diagnose exactly what the problem was and implement a plan to fix it.

Eat your heart out, Belichick

They followed my strategy to a T and got right back into the game. 6 different players scored for the Starks in the second half (Ted, Chin, Chain [1st of the season!], Megan, Alex Carey, and C-note) and 7 different players had assists (same plus Ian) in the second half. We put together 5 breaks and won the second half 10-7, but that 0-5 run to end the first half was too big a hole to dig out of.

Of note: 28 combined goals were scored in this game. Women scored or assisted 22 times.

You know, it’s that kind of incredible captaining skills that took Scott to the top of the league last year.  Of course, you may remember near the beginning of the year I had pointed out that no captain in Summer League history had ever gone from first place during the regular season to last place the following year.  20 years of Summer League.  Never happened.  Until….. potentially now.  Scott’s Nyan Cat went 9-1 last year to finish 1st among 16 teams in 2018.  But this year, now sitting at 1-7 and currently in last place, he is dangerously close to the complete flip of the script and a possible record.

Their final game is against 3-4 House Arryn next Monday.

And now, we have Maria, Duke of Tarth with a barcap:

Well folks, it’s finally happened. I met the man, the myth, the commissioner of an all-male Ping Pong League: Andy Bandit. My life is now divided into pre-Robin Hood Pub at 10:30 on July 29, 2019 and the post. I will never be the same and I can only hope I left an equal impression on him. This meeting was the culmination of an extremely one-sided relationship in which he sent me emails asking for money in exchange for Frisbee (you know the ones) which I promptly archived. I never thought I’d be hobnobbing with the big boss after a Summer League game and I can say with all honesty that he is the biggest celebrity I’ve met since moving to LA in February.

But let me start at the beginning. After a rollicking game at Sepulveda in which House Tarth scored more points than House Stark (the wolf house for those of you who don’t know). It was also our illustrious player Steph’s last game, so of course we threw many shitty throws to her in the end zone, and she somehow managed to catch most of them, AND threw the winning point! We also knighted all five of their ladies so we’ve literally solved sexism and are the epitome of equity. You’re welcome. I managed to make it to the fields 30 minutes and 5 points into the game because I am a high powered CAREER WOMAN who works in the biz of show.

Post-game, the two teams headed to Robin Hood for drinks, merriment, and British accents. And by the two teams, I mean Nay, myself, and the Alex crew (the three players on the Starks named Alex) (+Andy after we called him over) . The more intimate group meant that we really got into some deep conversations.

Topics included:
– Our “7 on the line” in the LA frisbee scene which is apparently what you call the top 7 Frisbee people you would hook up with. WHO KNEW!
-Which Alex is the hottest Alex! Tall Alex started out as a front-runner, but quickly dropped to 3rd, due to his below average personality.
-Whether we’d rather date someone who’s filthy at Frisbee but only has a mediocre personality or vice versa (I’ll leave it to you to guess where we landed!) ALSO whether someone looking good in a bikini mattered more than literally any other quality they might have (spoiler alert: the men at the table had some SUPER original hot takes! This also may or may not be the point in the night that tall Alex fell fast and hard in the rankings)
-Whether Frisbee players can be super-jacked and also super-good (jury’s still out)
-The incredibly universal experience of getting a Home Box Office Go free trial exclusively to watch the seminal documentary Leaving Neverland

-David Reed
-The burnout rate of sexual assault advocates!
-How Nay only gets mad once every 5 years, but MAN can she hold a grudge
-How I remind Andy of someone named Eva. If you are Eva please comment below and we can decide if he’s right or wrong. It is now confirmed that I do indeed suffer from a phenomenon I like to call “friend face” in which I remind everyone of their niece/friend/aunt/coworker/lover. I attribute this to looking like a composite of every white girl in America, my boisterous personality, and my complete lack of boundaries. Also, I have a twin sister so I’m an expert at looking like someone else. Photo below:

-The many wonderful qualities of Stephanie Schaffer
-Medium-sized Alex’s one piece of marriage advice (Don’t do long distance!)
-Andy Bandit’s all male Ping-Pong League and it’s many snafu’s. He is bad at it and has a terrible track record in terms of his female retention rate. (Can’t imagine why, playing competitive Frisbee with 24 men in Andy’s backyard sounds fun, inclusive, definitely not nightmarish!) Please reach out to him directly if you’d like to join.
-And the many benefits of a liberal arts education.

A word to the wise: DO NOT order the chicken tenders from Robin Hood. You will instead receive three sad pieces of grilled chicken on a plate.

NOTE TO ANDY: PLEASE ADD ANY TOPICS I DID NOT COVER

AND THAT’S ALL SHE WROTE!

Wow.  That’s pretty much all the topics.  Yeah, I don’t think you missed anything.

The girl really knows how to simultaneously charm and shame the person who posts the recaps.  Well played.

My Ping Pong League is absolutely Co-ed.  It’s just that we didn’t have any women last year.  I understand this is problematic, but Paparazzi is already on board next year to be the token female, and thus, problem solved!!!  Equity!

Fact check: I did not say she looked like Eva.  But close.  Alex said she looks like Ivana Monson (aka “Spoon”)

So let’s do a side by side comparison, as David Reed has said numerous times now that Maria (2) looks like Stephanie Schaffer (3), Alex says she looks like Ivana (1), and I haven’t made any facial comparisons yet.  If I had to pick between their two choices, I think I have to side with Reed.  But maybe this needs to be a poll.

Nay talking about that grudge she held was hysterical.  Definitely the comedy moment of the night.

Also worth noting that Alex Scholefield has a non-Frisbee nickname, which is so rare.  It’s Jackpot.  Also Slushfield.

6 comments

  • alex carey

    July 30, 2019 at 1:06 pm

    for the record i’m tall Alex and im the worst of the alex’s.

    Reply

    • Reed

      July 30, 2019 at 1:23 pm

      AC, Chin, and Slushfield should start a band: “AAA” and only play shows at The Garage on Motor Ave. in Palms

      Reply

  • alex carey

    July 30, 2019 at 1:10 pm

    this entire time i thought nay was talking about Stephanie hicks and that’s why I didn’t see it at all.

    Reply

  • Reed

    July 30, 2019 at 1:20 pm

    Scott recapped the game with more detail and succinctness from another time-zone than I’m capable of despite me being at the actual game, so here are some Stark vs Tarth highlights.

    Stark:
    – Ted approached me before the game and said his contact lens just split open and he couldn’t see out of his left eye and proceeded to throw dirty dimes against us all night. MIND GAMES!

    – Stark only had 4 women on a HOT night and they played their hearts out, losing this game in true Stark fashion.

    – C-Note had an amazing layout score on a deep huck I gave up on cause I deemed it uncatchable by anyone. She probably has two very stingy turf burns on her elbows now.

    Tarth:

    – Stephanie Hubli played her last game with us and will be sorely missed.

    – I gave a pep talk on the O line of game point about NOT forcing dumb throws just cause we wanna send Steph off with the game winner. We proceed to work it to the redzone beautifully then I jack up a hammer to Steph that sailed over her head. Do as I say not as I do. Stark breaks, and I sheepishly remove myself. Steph throws the game winner.

    – Johnnie had a 2 marg lunch is now 100% on chicken wing throws for the season.

    – Dana was our most reliable handler and threw some impressive breaks.

    – Aaron caught a bunch of scores where it appeared he wasn’t looking at or expecting the disc. Suddenly making the disc appear in his hand like a magician doing slight of hand

    Reply

  • alex carey

    July 30, 2019 at 1:52 pm

    the topic wasn’t about the hottest alex in la, because drum wins that hands down right now. The topic was more of a historical approach. Which alex has had the most impact on los angeles ultimate. I think I seed high historically but there are other higher seeds.

    Number 1 probably has to be Alex Korb, played club for years, coached ucla, tons of league and tons of pickup plus he’s still here.
    Number 2 is probably Alex David. less club experience, but more league, a little more involvement in some area, plus he married another ultimate player. Marrying another ultimate player ups your rank. You could be a historical nobody and if you married andy bandit you’d probably jump to top 3 of your name.
    Number 3 is maybe where I fit in.

    As for the all male league, I think I scared Amy away, sorry.

    Reply

  • Joanna

    July 31, 2019 at 3:19 pm

    I also know what it’s like to be told by everyone I meet “You know who you remind me of? My friend so-and-so”. Cool…

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Copyright © 2019 LAOUT | Designed by Tk Design

Want to Get Involved?       Become a Member       Calendar       Code of Conduct       Contact